Thursday, October 23, 2008

Mr. Poates, I'll see you at the beach

I am writing a new blog post because I have a second and I can.  Wow... Life is busy.  I am tired.  I feel like this is becoming a broken record.  Anyways, life travels on and I am getting closer to deadlines that I thought I would never make it to.

I go up for candidacy in the Presbyterian Church (USA) on Tuesday.  I don't know how I feel about that.  Right now, I figure whatever is going to happen is going to happen.  Yet, I still find myself making back-up plans.... It would be funny to me to get an M.Div and not have the endorsement of a church.  However, that does feel like my life- always having part of the puzzle and not the whole thing.

That leads me to my studies on Anxiety, Ego, and Ontology.  I always feel like I have it right here in front of me.  All the pieces are there.  And I'm just not smart enough to put them together.  The answer is somewhere in this jumbled and muddled mess and if I were a little more disciplined, a little more intelligent, I could actually use the time I have to put them together in order to make the picture come through.  Oh, well... I need a vacation... 

I talked with this gentleman the other day before he died.  In fact, I was the last person he talked to...  And I asked him if he could go anywhere, wher
e would it be.  He said the beach.  He'd never been.  I asked him what he thought the sand would be like.  And he said gross and boring.  So I asked him about the water. And he said cold and uncomfortable.  So, I asked him why he wanted to go to the beach.  He told me, "Because I imagine there are a lot of people there." "You like people, Mr. Poates?"  "Oh yes," he told me.  "I like to watch them.  I just want to sit at the beach on a bench and watch all those people..."

I'll see you at the beach, Mr. Poates.... 
 May you rest well with the saints on your vacation

1 comment:

Greg Bolt said...

if the church does not endorse you, you who have been in the places that Jesus calls us to be, you who provide honest, loving, and sometimes really funny critique to not only tradition but to change. If the church or Presbytery doesn't endorse you they have once again missed the forest for the trees and act out in fear when I see hope for people like you and me. Hope to change the perception of what it means to be a Christian, hope that Jesus actually meant it when he said, "love your neighbor as yourself." You have my prayers my friend!

Blessings,
Greg

PS don't forget to breathe.